The billionaire bromance between President Donald Trump and Elon Musk has combusted in glorious, petty fashion and Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is watching from the sidelines with sass, shade, and soundbites. When asked about the fallout while heading into the Capitol, the Bronx congresswoman did not hold back.
“Oh man, the girls are fighting, aren’t they,” she quipped with the ease of a drag queen judging a DIY wig reveal.
But that wasn’t all. AOC, in full prophecy mode, said this feud was written in the stars and narcissism. “We’ve been seeing that these two huge egos were not longed for being together in this world as friends,” she added. “This breakup, we’ve been seeing a long time coming.”
Honestly? She ate.
From MAGA Mutuals to Messy Exes: How Trump and Musk’s Ego Alliance Cracked Under the Weight of One Very Ugly Bill
Once bonded by deregulation, chaos, and matching delusions of grandeur, Trump and Musk have officially parted ways. And it’s messier than Kim Cattrall’s Sex and the City exit.
Elon, who was absurdly titled Head of the Department of Government Efficiency (you can’t make this up), revolted against Trump’s “big, beautiful bill” a trillion-dollar Frankenstein of spending and pork. Musk called it a legislative disaster, a recession risk, and worst of all, a threat to his legacy.
The cherry on this tantrum sundae? Elon floated a conspiracy theory that Trump isn’t actually Trump anymore but a body double.
From Donor Daddy to Bitter Ex: Elon Claims He Made Trump President While Trump Threatens to Cut His Government Contracts
Musk, the ever-delusional tech warlord, reminded everyone he poured $290 million into Trump’s campaign and followed him around the country like a golden retriever in Yeezys. He now insists he alone secured Trump’s 2024 win and kept Republicans from losing the Senate.
Trump responded with that classic “thanks but f*** you” energy, saying he “would have won Pennsylvania anyway” and that Musk went “CRAZY!” after the White House snatched back his EV mandates and tossed out his NASA nomination.
And like a dumped ex deleting your Netflix profile, Trump retaliated by threatening to shred every Tesla and SpaceX contract tied to the federal government. Billions of dollars. Poof.
Electric Vehicle Drama, NASA Shade, and a Pork-Filled Budget: The Petty Policy Spat That Set This Breakup Ablaze
The root of the feud? A legislative cluster called the “One Big Beautiful Bill.” Trump loves it. Musk hates it. Elon called it ugly, bloated, and unfair especially since oil and gas subsidies remained untouched while EV incentives were gutted.
He went full Tumblr-thread, tweeting, “In the entire history of civilization, there has never been legislation that [is] both big and beautiful… Slim and beautiful is the way.”
Trump, unfazed, claimed Musk was only upset because he got his government goodies revoked. “They’re having a hard time the electric vehicles,” the president mumbled, conjuring up grammar hell. “And they want us to pay billions.”
He also pulled SpaceX darling Jared Isaacman’s NASA nomination, saying it was inappropriate to appoint someone “totally Democrat.” Which is rich, considering he just had Elon riding shotgun to rallies six months ago.
From Space Ships to Epstein Files: Musk Goes Nuclear With Wild Accusations as Trump Shrugs It Off on Truth Social
After being publicly dumped, Elon started lobbing grenades. First, he threatened to decommission the rockets currently supporting NASA missions as if the International Space Station is part of his messy divorce.
Then, in a plot twist pulled straight out of a Dan Brown fever dream, Musk accused Trump of being named in the Jeffrey Epstein files.
“Mark this post for the future,” he warned on X. “The truth will come out.”
The White House’s official response? Polished and pointed. Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt simply said Elon was mad because the bill didn’t reflect his wish list.
An unnamed source, however, brought the real heat: “If Elon truly thought the president was more deeply involved with Epstein, why did he hang out with him for six months and say he ‘loves him as much as a straight man can love a straight man?’”
If shade were a sport, that would’ve been an Olympic gold medal.
MAGA Civil War Erupts: Steve Bannon Screams ‘Deport Elon’ While Tesla Shares Tank and Mike Johnson Tries to Play Mediator
As this catfight escalated, the Republican Party began to fracture like a Real Housewives friend group. Steve Bannon called Musk an “illegal alien” and demanded he be deported.
Meanwhile, House Speaker Mike Johnson looked like the exhausted mom in a custody battle, telling reporters he was “urgently trying to call Elon now” as Tesla’s stock plummeted nearly 15 percent.
On Truth Social, Trump shrugged at Musk’s Epstein allegations and doubled down on his pork-tastic bill. “This is one of the Greatest Bills ever presented to Congress,” he declared, like a man reviewing his own cologne.
AOC Laughs, America Cringes, and the Bromance Burns in Public
While billionaires collapse into infighting, AOC remains the voice of the people and the GIFs. Her commentary is pure legend: “The girls are fighting.”
And fight, they did.
One former campaign bestie is screaming about subsidies. The other is threatening space mutiny and citing Epstein’s conspiracy theories. And the GOP? Divided, exhausted, and probably Googling “How to mute Elon Musk.”
As the dust settles, we’re left with this undeniable truth: In the reality TV presidency of Donald Trump, Elon Musk was the chaotic guest star who overstayed his welcome.
