Ashley St. Clair Tells Donald Trump to Hit Her Up If He Needs Breakup Advice After Elon Musk Tantrum

The Republican Party isn’t the only place where loyalty is tested and paternity is vague. Welcome to the messier-than-a-Maury-episode beef between Elon Musk and Donald J. Trump, now featuring Ashley St. Clair, alleged mother of one of Musk’s 14(ish) children, who’s decided to pour gasoline on the political bonfire with a side of maternal sass.

In a post that could only be described as post-breakup shade-meets-paternity-chic, St. Clair took to X (formerly Twitter, now a semi-private Muskian playground) and fired off:

“Hey @realDonaldTrump lmk if u need any breakup advice.”

The comment was served chilled just hours after Elon Musk, yes, the space king, AI prophet, and part-time baby daddy, whined that Trump wouldn’t have won the 2024 election without him.

“Without me, Trump would have lost the election, Dems would control the House and the Republicans would be 51-49 in the Senate,” Musk tweeted like the ex who still texts you his gym stats. “Such ingratitude,” he pouted in a follow-up.

Trump vs Musk: Custody Battle for the GOP?

Trump, never one to let a fellow megalomaniac have the last word, ripped Musk a new one on Truth Social, sounding very much like someone who just got dumped over text.

“Elon was ‘wearing thin,’ I asked him to leave,” Trump claimed on Thursday. “I took away his EV Mandate that forced everyone to buy Electric Cars that nobody else wanted (that he knew for months I was going to do!), and he just went CRAZY!”

It’s giving petty prom king with a nuclear arsenal. But while Trump and Musk squabble over whose ego is more fragile, Ashley St. Clair is somewhere in a silk robe sipping matcha and wondering why the two richest men in America are this emotionally available all of a sudden.

Baby Mama, Billionaire, and a $15 Million Silence Deal

If St. Clair’s name rings a bell, it’s because she broke the Internet in February when she publicly claimed to be the mother of Elon Musk’s child, a child that Musk was allegedly trying to negotiate into invisibility.

According to her explosive Wall Street Journal interview in April, Musk, via his ever-loyal fixer Jared Birchall, offered her a hush-hush deal: $15 million in one glorious payout, plus $100,000 a month until the child turns 21. (Do the math. That’s $30 million and change for a whisper.)

But St. Clair said, “No, thanks.”

“I don’t want my son to feel like he’s a secret,” she reportedly told Birchall.

Powerful. Poetic. Potentially prepped for reality TV.

So… Is Elon the Father?

Musk, in a display of Schrödinger’s paternity, has reportedly told associates that he doesn’t know for sure whether the child is his. But the Journal dropped a number that had jaws hitting marble countertops: 99.9999% probability of paternity

That’s not just “possibly.” That’s “you might want to send a Cybertruck to preschool pickup” territory.

If confirmed, the child would join Musk’s increasingly baroque family tree, which includes:

• Six kids with ex-wife Justine Wilson (including tragically deceased Nevada and twins Griffin and Xavier, now Vivian)
• Three children with artist Grimes (yes, including X Æ A-Xii, still not pronounceable)
• Four children with Neuralink executive Shivon Zilis (Strider, Azure, Arcadia, and Seldon Lycurgus, because of course)

But wait, there might be more. Sources told the Journal that Musk’s true number of offspring is “much higher than publicly known.”

Messy, Fertile, and Mad Online

While Musk preaches about population collapse and Trump screams about mandates, Ashley St. Clair just wants her son to know he’s not an afterthought with a trust fund. And in the middle of this 40-billion-dollar daddy derby, she’s the one delivering the most iconic line of the week, an effortless dunk on two of America’s most powerful men:

“lmk if u need any breakup advice.”

Consider this an open invitation to The Real Baby Mamas of Silicon Valley, starring Ashley, a paternity test, and a prenup clause written in Klingon.