A white woman has been receiving attention because of posting a video on TikTok in which she says that Black men are the most committed fathers in America, using government data to dispel the stereotype that she says is common to hear every time she talks about dating.
In the video “Black Men Are The MOST Involved Fathers”, Stephie Jo, who is a white mother of six, says that the CDC’s study findings show that Black men are the most involved fathers across all races, regardless of their cohabitation with the mother of their child.
“The CDC recently came out with findings that Black men are the most involved fathers out of all races in and out of the home, meaning whether they’re with the mother or not, they’re still the most involved fathers out of all the other races,” she says.
She explains why the matter matters to her, given the reaction she gets from the internet.
“And if you’re new and asking yourself why is a white girl talking about this, anytime I share the fact that I prefer to date Black men, that is a very big comeback: ‘Oh well, you’re gonna be a single mom,'” she said. “Like other races don’t make you a single mom, and like I don’t have white children and being a single mom, and this has been a very strong conversation, and I feel like a very important one.”
Stephie Jo says her personal experience and that of her friends don’t match the stereotype.
“I can’t speak for any other race, but I know a lot of my white friends who are with white partners, including myself, as my ex is white, we had white partners living in the home with us, like we’re in a relationship with them, and we still felt like single parents,” she notes.
“So many people ask me like how I was able to manage being a single mom to so many children, as I have six kids altogether,” she continues. “Nothing really changed for me besides I stopped expecting help that was never gonna happen.”
“I’ve talked about this on here, but almost all the Black men I’ve known in my life have been amazing, very involved fathers,” she concludes.
Stephie Jo also denies criticizing the white fathers collectively.
“Before the fellow white people come for me, I am not saying that white dads cannot be good dads, OK?” Stephie said. “But this is just to talk about the narrative that Black men is the only one that makes single moms, and that’s the biggest comeback when it comes.”
In her opinion, involvement after separation matters more.
“But to me, like, the relationship ending doesn’t mean you’re no longer a father. And I think it means more if you are putting in that effort and that energy when you’re not with the mother, because it’s easier when you’re in a relationship and living in the same house to be an involved father,” she said. “It’s easier, but when you’re having to put in that extra effort, that’s more impressive in my eyes.”
@stephiejjo I would rather my kids dad be an involved father regardless what our relationship status is than someone who stays just for the kids & beg for bare minimum with parenting while living in the home 🤷♀️ #blackmen #parenting #interracialcouple
♬ original sound – Stephie Jo 💕
What the CDC found
The information that Stephie Jo uses in her video is not new. The study findings cited by her are provided in the report called “Fathers’ Involvement With Their Children: United States, 2006 to 2010“, by Jo Jones and William D. Mosher. This report was published on December 20, 2013. The study sample included 10,403 men aged 15 to 44 and compared only three groups of fathers: Hispanic, White, and Black; that means that it did not cover all the races.
According to the CDC, among fathers living with children under age five, the Black fathers (70%) were most likely to bathe, dress, diaper, or assist children in using the toilet daily compared with White fathers (60%) and Hispanic fathers (45%).
The CDC’s report shows that 78% of Black fathers living with children under age five ate meals with them or fed them daily compared with 74% of White fathers and 64% of Hispanic fathers.
Among the school-age children, the CDC noted that 41% of Black fathers living with children assisted them with homework every day compared with 29% of Hispanic fathers and 28% of White fathers. Also, Black fathers (27%) more often than White fathers (20%) took their children to and from activities every day.
The CDC report also supports Stephie Jo’s statement about fathers who do not live with their children, although the gaps are not equal. The CDC report shows that 63% of Hispanic fathers who did not live with their children talked to them about their day in the past four weeks, compared with 29% of White fathers and 21% of Black fathers. At the same time, 82% of Hispanic and 70% of white fathers did not help with homework at all, compared with 56% of Black fathers.
The authors admit the limitations of their study. They provide only descriptive statistics and do not establish causation; in general, fathers living with their children are more involved than those living away from them.
The myth for many years
The study’s results have been cited for years by those trying to break the myth of the absentee Black father. In the Center for Fathers and Families in Sacramento, California, one of the major purposes is to dispel this myth, according to ABC10.
Josh Levs has highlighted CDC figures showing that about 2.5 million Black fathers were living with their children, while about 1.7 million were living away, and he pointed out that most of those living away remain involved in the lives of their children.
